When I signed up to be a Jcrew life group leader- I did it because I thought it would be a fun way to serve at LCBC. I recalled my days in youth group and thought "yea I could be a kid again." I figured it would be a good time... Never did I expect it to have the affect on me that it has. I work with 7th and 8th grade girls. I LOVE them! Our mission in Jcrew is to demonstrate God's love to the kids, tell and show them that God loves them, and make sure they know that they are Loved. (Period).
Notice a connection to my blog name?
It started off as fun. Observing on Sunday mornings, getting to know some of the girls. Then evening gatherings started and instead of observing- I was "running the show." I hit the ground running! Got to really begin to know the girls who regularly attend during "my gathering", helped out at the All-nighter, and had 2 different times that I got together with the girls outside of LCBC structured events. It's been awesome! I pray for my girls, check-in with them from time to time, and look forward to seeing them every week...
We started talking about winter retreats and I was all about going! Retreats with youth group hold some of my greatest memories from the awkward middle school and high school years. They played a vital role in keeping me out of trouble, strengthening friendships, helping me to grow as a person and at times allowing me to realize that I was important. (I struggled with getting "lost" in my family because I was the "social" child.)
The closer avalanche gets- the more excited I get.
It hit me tonight... This is it... My first official chance to make a huge difference in these girl's lives.
I started remembering the various youth leaders that were influential to me:
The "main pastor" who I'm pretty sure was just looking for a way to stay a kid- always wanting to have a good time.
The "camp mom" who was a camp counselor almost every year, loved us all but would disappear from regular events.
The "mean leaders" who insisted we follow every rule and then some.
The "life saver" who literally saved my life white water rafting and always had a way of making you feel like you mattered.
The "other youth pastor" who also wanted to be a kid but who also spoke the harsh realities and truths.
The "wallflowers" who I know were there but I couldn't even tell you who they were- they just stood by and filled in as needed.
** disclaimer both youth pastors mentioned above did a great job of sharing the word of God. And both were parents of my friends. I created the list based on what stood out first when I thought of these people.**
I realized now was my chance to create a name for myself... How did I want to be remembered?
I thought about it- and got distracted thinking I should shoot a message to the life saver sometime letting them know the difference they made and continue to make in my life- once back on track I decided...
I want to be a combination of them all (excluding the wall flower and mean ones).
I want to be the leader that is a big kid at heart, who makes everyone feel like they matter and are loved. I want to be stable- consistently there. Someone who the girls feel they can turn to when they need support, guidance or just a friend. I want to be honest- I have not lived a "perfect Christian life"- I want them to be able to learn from mistakes I've made. I want to be an example- not just say follow these rules but show how it's done and why it's better not to break them. I want to help create memories that will last a life time.
My goal for the weekend is to have an awesome time. I hope I can meet my hopes for the type of leader I want to be... And if I fall short I hope the girls will see Gods love for them through me.
Also- I'm really hoping for an opportunity to top what is quite possibly the greatest camp prank I have ever been a part of... Youth pastors choose your words wisely- when you tell us to leave the chairs alone... You just might find each chair all alone around camp!
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